MBA Graduates Targeting Micro-Finance Feared to Be ‘Micro-Donors’
Los Angeles, CA (AP) – Business schools have welcomed the recent popularity of fields like micro-finance and social entrepreneurship among their graduates. In fact, many programs have used the popularity of these fields to improve the tarnished image that MBA graduates have in the wake of the financial crisis. At the same time, a recent closed-door meeting among deans at several leading MBA programs focused on an unspoken concern about the rise in popularity of socially responsible business and what it means to the bottom line at their universities. A dean that spoke with Clear Admit under the condition of anonymity had the following take on the issue: “MBA graduates who move to Africa and help small businesses secure credit are doing admirable work, but to be frank, they’re not making enough coin to be in a position to help finance a new building for our school. Back in the 1980s, when greed was good, our program was able to extract substantial donations from graduates – many of who were simply looking for an easy way to assuage the guilt they felt about how they’d earned their fortunes. Today, it’s a different story. Our socially responsible graduates are fiscally irrelevant to our development office.”
Microsoft Paid Millions for Chicago Booth PowerPoint Requirement
Redmond, WA (Bloomberg) – The Chicago Booth MBA admissions office has been praised for its innovative use of a PowerPoint assignment as part of the application process. The first school to require such an exercise, they’ve been featured in the popular press for their unique approach to evaluating candidates. But more recently, their motivation for implementing the PowerPoint essay has been called into question – as the Federal Trade Commission has unveiled an elaborate and devious product placement scandal between Microsoft (the makers of PowerPoint) and the Booth admissions team. According to sources, early indications are that Microsoft approached Chicago Booth with an offer to ‘bolster’ the schools endowment in exchange for ‘viral’ promotion of the PowerPoint software application. A Microsoft employee familiar with the matter offered the following explanation: “We were watching our brand erode before our eyes as MBA students opted to purchase Macs and use rival software packages like Keynote. The thinking was that by indoctrinating applicants into the PowerPoint universe, via the Booth application assignment, we’d reassert ourselves and maintain our stranglehold on the business world. We made Booth an offer they couldn’t refuse.”
Leading MBA Program to Begin Accepting GRE, LSAT and MCAT Exams
Ann Arbor, MI (Reuters) – The Ross School of Business at the University of Michigan will be accepting the LSAT, MCAT and GRE exams in addition to the GMAT for admission to the program in the fall of 2011. Director of Admissions and Financial Aid, Soojin Kwon Koh, explained the program’s approach: “We’ve paid close attention as some of our competitors have begun accepting the GRE alongside the GMAT, and we wanted to make a bold statement in an effort to truly expand the applicant pool.” Kwon Koh added that “the decision may be viewed as a radical move, but the message we have for applicants is that we’re open minded and flexible. When challenged about her decision and asked whether accepting four exams was simply too many, Kwon Koh offered the following remark: “I’d liken our approach to Gillette’s response when Schick first introduced the Quattro men’s razor – Gillette quickly pounced by introducing the market-leading 5-blade cartridge, and they’ve never looked back. Do you think that there was anyone on the Gillette team who said ‘five blades is simply too many’? Well, I can assure you that there is no one in our office who feels that accepting four exams is a negative.”
As Schools Trend Towards Younger Students, Student Life Changes Dramatically
Boston, MA (Knight-Ridder) – In a trend started by business schools such as Harvard and Stanford, many business schools are courting younger applicants. With this preference for younger students growing among elite schools, many have now taken the steps to additionally offer extracurricular opportunities aimed at persuading younger applicants to attend. For example, Harvard Business School’s Wine & Cuisine Society (WCS) will become the Beer Pong Guild (BPG) in August 2010. Instead of the annual WCS Ball, students will compete in a ten-team beer pong tournament, complete with a bonus kegstand elimination round. Scotty Dee, a 21-year-old current college senior and incoming HBS first-year, told Clear Admit that he is eager to join the BPG and compete against Wharton’s newly-formed Beirut League. Meanwhile, Stanford’s Biz Partners & Biz Kids, a group that helps MBA partners become part of the GSB community, will now focus its services exclusively on parents of incoming GSB first-years. Stanford student Krista Singh spoke highly of this new focus, although she admits that she “wouldn’t be surprised if in three months the parents are the ones planning activities for us!” Finally, CMU Tepper’s Poker Club has instituted a “wildcard” event in its annual Vegas trip aimed at students who not of legal age to gamble in US casinos.
Happy April Fools’!
The Clear Admit Team
(for more April Fools’ fun: 2009, 2008, 2007, 2006, 2005, 2004)
